Anti-AOL

That's right, hackers, this is a no-strings-attached free gift from AOL to you, their nifty hackers - hack into as many free AOL accounts as you want and some of them will be yours to keep, free-of-charge, FOREVER. This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity - get'm NOW before other hackers lift all the free AOL accounts for you!

The only catch? Once AOL learns a free AOL account is compromised, it will be "blocked" for about the same length of time: forever. I imagine AOL might delete it.

But hackers: Don't let AOL's silly account deletion stop you!

Even if you must stop using a hacked AOL account after a while, just think - the original account owner can never have it back, either. As in NEVER!

Not even if it was a paid account from, say, 1991, with tons of personal information and thousands of emails that got converted into a supposedly more headache-free free AOL account.

Not even if the owner of the hacked account gives every proof of payment and identity possible to AOL. You can't lose!

To ensure my accuracy, here's Randolph:

How to Make Hacked Free AOL Accounts Your Own

OK. So a month ago (around July 20-30) I was signed offline on my AOL account on AIM. I couldn't get back on. Tryed to reset my password and its telling me all my security answers and information is invalid. I phone AOL's Customer Service line. They transfer me to AOL's Fraud Department. I tell them the story, they "block" the account from anyone accessing it. They asked me to send in 2 forms of documentation stating I am the original owner of the account. A drivers license and a bank statement showing when I was last billed for AOL, on it.

Now. Keep in mind. This is a Free AOL account. It was converted into a Free AOL from a Paying AOL in 2006-2007 when the Free AOL Program launched.

So we phone (also went to) the bank and ask them to look up the account that's tied to the AOL account. It's a checkings account that has been closed for several years now. They want to charge us $6 per page to go back in time because a agency has to go through the account or something like that. So $20 total, they get the statement in a matter of 1-2 weeks and ask us to come pick it up at our local bank (branch). We go to Staples, made a copy of the drivers license and a copy of the bank statement, faxed it in.

Next day. We call up AOL's Fraud Department and speak to a Customer Representative who can barely speak any English what so ever. Make a long story short: they are telling us they need the Debit card, that was attached to the checkings accounts, number [so now we need to] fax in a document written by the bank, signed by the bank, with the debit card scanned or typed out on the paper. This was when I knew AOL really has lost it.

We aren't able to obtain that AT ALL. The card was shredded YEARS ago and when we went to the bank, they all looked at us funny and even the customers on line behind us said "no that can't be possible".....like we were crazy! The bank even said the 2 forms of ID we previously sent should be ENOUGH. MORE THEN ENOUGH.

Fast forward to today actually just now: I call AOL's Fraud Department. I get an American Customer Representative. She tells me straight up answers.

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Quote - AOL Fraud Telephone Conversation

Me: What am I suppose to do if I can't get that debit cards information?
Her: I don't know what to tell you. It's a standard procedure to protect the owner of this account. (me obviously)

Me: So let me ask you this. If someone makes a Free AOL account at http://aol.com, how do they get their account back if its compromised?
Her: They can't, they have to sign up for a new one.

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My jaw dropped. I couldn't believe what I just heard. That's when I just said OK and hung up.

I am BEYOND disgusted with AOL.

I filed a Internet Crime Complaint @ ic3.gov in an attempt hoping to get somewhere.

Please post any ideas/suggestions/comments relating to this. Thank you for reading.

Thanks to Craigs List (my reader's handle, not the website) Randolph (see comment below) for the heads-up.

Updated 7-1-09.

Since I wrote this post it's risen to the #1 slots for the keyword searches mentioned below, so to save you time if you're here for the phone number to report a hacked AOL or AIM account: it's 1-800-307-7969.

Tonight I typed "report hacked aol email" into Google and got, among other irrelevant things: "how to hack an AOL account". Brilliant! Just to ensure my fury shot from moderate to severe, I typed "contact aol hacked" next, and got the same damn results....curses on Google. May fire rain down from heaven all over their precious servers.

I'm trying to get someone help at this very moment for an account that's been hacked and I CANNOT DO IT. Half of it's Google's fault for not returning the phone numbers this person needs - the other half is AOL's fault for not allowing free members to report hacked accounts (I don't have this nailed down yet, but that's the info I'm working on in this person's email, since I list a number to report hacked accounts here; I'm trying to find out if this person called it or not).

7-1-09: Got a response from the person who sought my help with her hacked account last night: "Thank you for giving me this number. I had not called it, but I did today, and they were helpful and cancelled the account. Hopefully it's all taken care of. Thank you again!" Whew.

Since I had a feeling she simply could not find the number, I have added the number itself to my links list (you will see it if you look now on the side of the page) so no one else has to go through not being able to find it again. I hate seeing someone suffer for the lack of something so simple - an AOL phone number that everyone seems to want to hide.

While I'm relieved the person who emailed me is now getting help, and also relieved to learn AOL still assists free users who's accounts are hacked, as far as Google goes, after what I saw last night...Google can blow me.